When Silence Isn’t Safe

Healing After Abuse in Yachting and Beyond

Self-Care Onboard – New Podcast Episode

This episode of Self-Care Onboard opens a conversation that’s long overdue: abuse, bullying, and the silent culture that enables it within the yachting industry.

These are not theoretical discussions. These are lived realities—both on land and at sea.

It’s not just about raising awareness.It’s about taking full responsibility for healing.

Emotional Imprints and Wound Memory

Abuse leaves a mark—sometimes visible, often not. What remains is what I refer to as wound memory—an unresolved experience held in the body that overwhelms the nervous system.

This is what many call trauma, but not everyone relates to that word.

So let’s call it what it is: An emotional imprint that shapes our patterns, reactions, and sense of self.

Left unprocessed, it silently dictates how we show up in relationships, work environments, and decisions. In industries like yachting—where hierarchy, isolation, and reputation often matter more than well-being—this imprint can deepen without ever being acknowledged.

Stepping Out of Victimhood

“Why continue suffering when you hold the key in your own hand?”

There comes a moment when we must decide: Stay stuck in blame, or take a step toward freedom.

It's understandable to mistrust when you've been hurt. But not everyone is the same. The belief that “it always happens” or “people never change” can become a self-fulfilling loop.

We have to be willing to look at the part we may have unconsciously played in repeating certain dynamics—not to blame ourselves, but to finally close the cycle.

It’s often subtle.Like when we enter a new job or work relationship, and something in us knows it doesn’t feel quite right. Our intuition speaks—but instead of listening, we override it. We justify, minimize, or doubt ourselves.

This pattern often stems from early life.

As children, many of us were dismissed when we sensed something was wrong. Maybe we were told we were being too sensitive. Maybe we were ignored by peers or caregivers—or made to feel our instincts were wrong. Over time, we begin to trust outsiders more than ourselves.

We grow up deferring to others—mentors, bosses, partners—hoping they’ll validate what we already know deep down. But when that doesn’t happen, we’re left in the same loop: self-abandonment, followed by pain, confusion, and shame.

The faces may change, but the pattern remains—until we choose differently.

Choosing differently means reclaiming the ability to trust ourselves again.To honour the signals of the body.To pause when something feels off—without needing to explain or justify it.

“Do not abandon yourself. It’s not about who left you—it’s about whether you’re still leaving you.”

The Myth of the Quick Fix

There is no fast-track. No one-step solution. Most people avoid healing because it asks us to feel pain we’ve spent years avoiding.

We numb. We distract. We rationalize.We stay in the same environments, hoping the outcome will change.

But here’s the truth:

“We cannot heal in the same surroundings that caused our pain.”

Whether it's an emotionally unsafe workplace, a toxic relationship, or a setting tied to trauma—healing requires something else:

• Distance

• Space

• A high-frequency environment

• And often, solitude

That walk alone can feel uncomfortable—but it’s where self love, self-respect, boundaries, and clarity are rebuilt.

The Path Forward

In this episode, I share the practices that continue to support me:

• Yoga Therapy and Qigong to regulate the nervous system

• Taiji to cultivate grounded presence and internal strength

• Somatic movement to process stored emotions

• Calisthenics and mobility training to rebuild physical and energetic resilience

• Obviously meditation and breathing exercises

• Clinical hypnotherapy, energy healing, quantum healing and alchemy healing techniques to neutralise the emotional imprint of trauma from the past, deal with ancestral and intergenerational trauma.

• Foods to stay grounded and not cause more anxiety to stay level headed. So, no alcohol, drugs and reduced caffeine intake.

• Detox programs through naturopathy and homeopathy. Note that for women consider your cycle to support your hormones and get them checked as trauma and stress can disregulate them.

• Longevity technology and biohacking in form of infusions, supplements and peptides to support detoxing, neutralising imbalances in your body and regulating hormones.

  
  

These are not trends. They are long-term tools to rewire stability, self-trust, and embodied presence. Note though that teh longevity technology, detox programs DO NOT replace the inner emotional healing work.

A Note on Language

Some people resist the word trauma. If that’s the case, ask why.

What matters is not what we call it—but whether we recognize it’s there.

Whether you refer to it as:

• Emotional imprint

• Wound memory

• Unresolved experience

• Nervous system overwhelm

“Call it what you need to—but don’t deny it. Denial keeps us stuck. Truth sets us free.”

When Seeking Becomes Escaping

After spending three months on Koh Phangan, I’ve witnessed how the healing path can sometimes be replaced by intensity, performance, and spiritual escapism.

What was once a quiet island rooted in Thai culture now feels overrun by a global crowd seeking transformation—but often bypassing the core emotional work.

Ceremonies are stacked back-to-back. Nervous systems get overwhelmed. Sacred practices like Tantra are rooetd in sexuality and used without reverence or depth. And many arrive with good intentions but end up numbing through the very tools that promised awakening.

It’s not a judgment—it’s a compassionate observation. Most people are doing the best they can with what they have. But discernment is needed.

And yet—there are those who are walking this path with deep integrity.People who don’t just talk about healing—they embody it.They’re not chasing light. They’re integrating shadow.

Maybe we don’t need to keep calling it a healing journey.

Let’s try:

• A return to wholeness

• A process of remembering

• Energetic maturation

• Coming home to self

  
  

“Whatever you call it, let it be real. Let it be rooted. Let it be yours.”

The Time Is Now

There is a collective urgency we can no longer ignore.

We’re living in timelines that are becoming increasingly direct, even harsh. And if we continue avoiding the deeper work—dismissing the pain, bypassing the discomfort—we risk being met with even more intense wake-up calls.

This is not a threat. It’s a truth.

“If we do not take our healing seriously, the lessons will repeat—louder, harder, and deeper—until we do.”

The time is now.

To stop running. To stop blaming. To choose transformation. To step into the unknown, into the discomfort, and into the radical courage it takes to meet ourselves fully.

“Freedom doesn’t come from controlling what’s outside. It comes from facing what’s within.”

This Work Isn’t Comfortable—But It’s Necessary

It’s easier to stay angry. To stay frozen. To wait for the world to change before we do.

Is it really ???

But that’s not how healing works.

We’re being called to mature—emotionally, spiritually, somatically. Not by bypassing pain, but by learning how to move through it.

What happened may not be your fault. But your healing is your responsibility.

🎧 Listen to the full episode on Yachting International Radio or your preferred podcast platform.👉